Accidental Spark
by ThePotterTribute
Summary: What if Ellie's romance with Cadan picks up? Will and Ellie haven't exactly been on good terms and Cadan is the only comforting figure Ellie has her eye on. Will/Ellie/Cadan
1. A Certain Doubt

**Author's Note: **_I am slightly appalled by the lack (well, ZERO amount) of fandoms about Angelfire. Well, anyways, I decided to write one to justify the magnificent trilogy by Courtney Allison Mourton. For whatever reason, I am really into the love triangle between Cadan, Will and Ellie. I know Will and Ellie will forever be the OTP of this series but I can't help but think that Cadan and Ellie need a little more scenes together, you know what I mean? It's like, Ellie knows she can't live without Cadan and Will but she's constantly pushing Cadan away! (Sorry, I get a little caught up in my drama about these three)_

This is an AU version of 'Angelfire #2: Wings of the Wicked.' In this world, Cadan and Ellie get to spend more time together as ALMOST but not lovers. A little more than friendship for a little tease in their chemistry.

**Author's Note 2:** _Oh, and btw, this is my first fanfiction so...be kind and R&R. xx__  
_

_Disclaimer: I do not own Angelfire. But if I did, I would totally put more sexy Cadan somewhere in these books._

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_**A Certain Wanting**  
_

_Fighting. Something I've never been able to escape; not even in my past lifetimes. It was a part of me. It seemed like violence and tragedy followed me around like shadow. Even in my dreams, I would envision myself in the middle of a battlefield. Blood. Massacre. Would any of these relentless visions stop?_

_This time, I'm in the dining room of my home. A sweet smell of pancakes fills my senses as I spot my mother bringing them out on a plate._

_"Good morning, Ellie Bean! Come over here and eat your breakfast." My mother motions me to come sit with her. As I walk towards her, I feel a sudden darkness in my surroundings. Slowly I turn around and find myself face-to-face with a reaper the size of a truck. His hot breath blows on my face and I choke on the awful smell. I check on my mother and realize she's not there._

_"Mom?" Panic shoots up my spine as I look around the house. Well, what remains of it. "MOM?" I yell once more._

_"Ellie." Her eyes wide open with fright, she gasps as she is held into the clawed hands of the enormous reaper. Right now, I was too scared to even cry out.  
_

_I call on my swords and raise them towards the monster. "My dear Warrior. Do you believe you can save the people you love? You endanger them all by merely existing in that human body." And one twist, I hear a snap indicating that my mom was a goner. I opened my mouth to release a scream that wouldn't come; too shocked to process what just happened._

I woke up gasping for breath. Last night's nightmare was completely out of line. _It wasn't real. It wasn't real. _Again and again, I tell myself but uncertainty grasped the pit of my stomach. I ran out towards the bathroom and felt a twinge of pain as I threw up in the toilet. _Ugh. That is just gross. _A sense of nausea crept in and set me down on the tiled floor, gagging my lungs out after I pulled on the lever to flush.

"Ellie? Ellie, are you okay?" I heard Will come into the room and a pair of strong arms held me upright into a sitting position.

I couldn't open my eyes, afraid I'll throw up on Will. I managed to keep my eyes closed until he carried me and set me on the bed. _I must look like a mess. _I thought. Why couldn't he have seen me in a more...attractive state? Right now I have as much appeal as a sack of potatoes.

"Will. W-why are you here?" I blurted out, knowing it sounded silly. His hand wipes my clammy forehead and pulls the blanket up to my chin.

"Ellie." He traced his thumb along my cheek and kissed my forehead. I shivered at the contact of his skin.

I don't know what happened next but I suppose I dozed off into another terrifying oblivion. I wanted to tell Will to not let me fall asleep again, afraid of dreaming about my mother's death once more.

The second time I woke up, I felt a tad bit better than I did earlier. Though a little light-headed, I managed to stand up without tilting to the side and falling on the floor. A moan escaped my lips as my muscles were sore from moving. After a few minutes of constantly having to drag myself towards the bathroom, I finally reached my destination. I stared into the mirror, slightly horrified at my reflection. My hair looked like a haystack and my eyes looked like I've been watching a seven hour movie with my nose to the screen. I was a hideous mess.

Getting the tangles out of my hair was one thing and making it look like hair it was another. I wonder how my hair got into this state. Did I wrestle with my sheets last night? Did my pillows attack me while I was unconscious? _God. And to think Will saw me like this. _My eyes water as I yawn and stretch my limbs. It's odd how I always seem to make sex noises as I stretch. I shake off the thought and take a shower.

Okay, so maybe after the shower I didn't look so much like a woodland creature anymore. But I still felt like I've been running around the globe. I got dressed and headed out the house. As I opened the door a gust of icy wind greets me hello.

"So much for taking a warm shower." My teeth chatter and I feel Will's presence even before I see him.

"You've had quite a rough night."

I sigh, trying not to recall my nightmare. "Yeah."

"Are you okay?" His features are soft as he looks at me with concern. I nod and walk past him towards the car.

He runs his hand though his hair as he makes way to the driver's side.

The car ride was quiet though I was able to get a conversation flowing as we talked about who we were meeting with tonight. Marcus and Ava, he mentioned.

"Where will we go later?" I asked.

He shrugged. "You'll see."

"Are they Guardians like you are?

He shook his head. I thought he'd say something else but he still kept his eyes glued to the road. I took a deep breath and sighed. Only then did his eyes shift towards my direction.

"Is something bothering you?"

I set my hands down on my thighs. "Finally! You said a sentence containing more than two words." I rolled my eyes.

He laughed. "Sorry. I've been preoccupied. I was thinking about what happened to you last night. You looked terrible."

I glared at him and leaned against the car window. "Gee, thanks." I grumbled.

"I didn't mean it that way. You looked...sick. Did you have a bad dream?"

I nodded and told him about what happened. He listened and stayed silent. Once we arrived at Nathaniel's house, I continued to tell him about my nightmare. After I finished, he held my hand which sent a jolt up my arm and lingered on the back of my neck. I missed Will. I missed feeling his touch.

We sat on the couch and I sat close to him, leaning my head on his shoulder. With my forehead to his neck, and his arms wrapped around me, I felt safe. Secure. Loved. I felt him take a deep breath as I laid my hand on his chest, feeling his heartbeat.

I looked up at him and saw him smiling. His lips lightly pecked my mouth. I giggled and he kissed my cheeks, making me blush slightly as he slowly trailed down my neck with soft kisses.

I sighed as his arms went around my waist, pulling me flush against his body. My hands flew up to tangle in the soft dark hair at the base of his neck. For a while we stayed still, his head buried in my hair, inhaling my scent. Nothing could ruin this. Except for the fact that Nathaniel stood a few feet away from us, clearing his throat to get Will's attention.

Will groaned in annoyance while Nathaniel looked at me and smiled. "I see both of you are...busy. But no worries, I was just going to tell Will that I'll be gone for a while." Assuming he noticed my worried look, I asked, "Where are you going?"

"Oh, I'll only be out for a day or two. Depending on what Lauren plans," he said, trying to hide a grin but failing miserably. I grinned widely in return and eyed him suspiciously.

"Hmm, what do you plan on doing with Lauren for two days?" He laughed nervously, as if guilty of my supposed accusation.

"Stuff."And with that, he paced towards the front door, his hand settling on the knob.

"Have fun!" I called behind Nathaniel as he shut the door. I swear I could still imagine him grinning madly at the idea I instilled into his imagination.

"So," I heard Will say. "Will we be having our own little _fun _while they're away?" _Uh-oh, sensing a little tease there. _I know exactly what he meant by _fun._ Will may be a six hundred year old angelic reaper, but h_e __was _still a guy.

I felt the weight of Will's stare and stood up from the couch, heading up the stairs. I could hear Will following so I decided not to face him until we got into his room.

As I opened the door, the scent of Will clouded my thoughts while I entered. Looking around, I could tell he cleaned up recently. Not long after, I felt him standing behind me and turned to face him.

I place my free hand on his chest and slowly raise myself along the length of his body, until my lips are right next his ear. I pause, taking a moment to enjoy the way he tenses in anticipation, before whispering, "Get some rest," and gracefully made my way towards the bed.

I hear him groan in frustration behind me before jumping on the bed and grabbing my waist to pull me down on top of him. I look into his emerald eyes and kiss him lightly, brushing strands of hair from his forehead. He smiles lazily at me, his hands making soft patterns on my back. I sigh and roll over on my side and pretend to be asleep until he places his hand on my belly.

"Will," I whisper. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything." He replies, looking at me with sudden curiosity and sincerity.

"Have you ever had any past girlfriends while I was...you know, _away?_" I ask with a difficulty saying the last word, knowing he'll have discomfort thinking about the times I was practically _dead._

I held my breath as he hesitated to answer. "No. I haven't had any...girlfriends."

"So you never dated anyone?" I pressed, a certain doubt tingling my mind.

"Why are you asking?" _Sounding a little dodgy now, are you, Will? _Was he avoiding the question?

"Just curious." A somewhat query filling my womanly instincts.

After a few seconds of thought, he finally answered, "I haven't _dated _anyone." The stern finality in his voice signaled to me that this was the end of the conversation.

"Okay." I said feebly and exhaled sharply. _Why do I feel like I don't believe him? _I know it's silly to even think so. Out of the five hundred years of partnership, Will has never lied to me. _Maybe not until now._

It was clear he didn't want to talk about it anymore, and in truth, I didn't either. My stomach turned and I looked at him. He was clearly drained, falling asleep in less than seconds. I rose from the bed and went downstairs to get myself a glass of water.

The hours ticked by and I found myself eating almost everything in the fridge. _Damn it, Ellie. Why do you have to be such a pig?_ Mentally cursing myself, I let myself wander around the house. Observing every little detail there was, I found a door leading to the patio. I pushed it open and went out into the freezing air. It wasn't so bad after you got used to it. Lowering myself onto a bench, I tried to relax.

After a while, I look around with a growing awareness of someone out here. I stood up and nearly screamed as Cadan's presence scared the living soul out of me. I punched his arm and clutched my chest as my heart raced like a rabbit's against my rib cage.

"What are you doing here?" I whispered; his grin making me want to punch him. Again.

"What? Is it a crime to visit an old friend?" _Psh, Cadan._

I scoffed. "Will is upstairs. He'll kill you!"

"Will," he said, mocking my voice in an odd tone that did not sound like me, "is unconscious and dreaming about llamas, toads and other things that are as weird as him."

I had to admit, I almost laughed. Instead, I rolled my eyes and shook my head. "You have to leave. He's gonna wake up soon."

"Soon," he repeated. "We'll have enough time then." He winked, which sent my heart fluttering fast like a little girl's.

I gave up, deciding it was futile to try to get Cadan to listen to anything I say. "Fine. But don't blame me if you get in trouble."

"Baby, trouble is my middle name." Cadan took a few steps towards me, minimizing the distance between us. I tensed as I could feel his breath on the top of my head. _I shouldn't even let him be this close to me._ But I didn't move away.

"Aren't you cold?" The moment he asked, I felt a shiver up my spine. He took off his jacket and draped it over my shoulders. I slip my arms through the sleeves, inhaling Cadan's soft smell of lavender and sunshine. If sunshine had a smell, this would be it.

"You smell nice." I blurted out and regretted it as soon as it came out of my mouth. He raised his eyebrow in surprise. "For a vir," I continued. I expected him to be offended or angry but he just shrugged.

"Well, I enjoy having red-heads complimenting me on my scent." He teased, slowly playing with the pendant of my necklace. I don't know how, but the space between us was completely closed in, his stomach and chest touching mine. I gasped as his warm hands cupped my face.

"What are you doing?"

He chuckled, his mint breath blowing across my face. "Just...stay still." _No, no, no! Look away, now! _I felt paralyzed. I could move but I wouldn't. I stood there, watching his face inch closer to mine. I waited for him to just get over with it. To kiss me. _I'm only doing this because I feel sorry for him. If I pulled away now, I'd hurt his feelings._ It sounded convincing enough in my head but I wasn't so sure that was the only reason I didn't pull away just yet.

His forehead touched mine but he didn't go any further. He was close enough to do it. Close enough to lay a soft kiss on my lips. But he didn't. Instead, he just stood there. Contented with the contact of our foreheads. Taking a deep breath, I grasped onto reality and took a step back. I didn't tear my eyes away from his, nor did he. However, he did take a step back as well and smiled gently.

"Your guard dog is up. I guess I gotta go." He was about to turn away, but looked back and said, "I'd like to do this again sometime. I wanna see you. Tonight, perhaps?"

I blinked twice and answered in a steady voice. "Rain check? I have something to do with Will. We're meeting a few people." _What I should have said was, _No. I won't. I can't. You're a reaper. You're the enemy. But for some miraculous reason, I couldn't find it in me to reject his offer.

"Its better than a 'no' I guess." His thumb traced my lips and I gasped. "I'll see you soon." A slight pause as he walks away. "But not soon enough." He winks and disappears into the Grim, leaving me dazed about what just happened a few minutes ago.

After a while, I heard Will going down the stairs. I didn't want to tell Will that Cadan had been here, but also, I couldn't keep any secrets from him. Though I'm sure he's hiding something from me _right now._


	2. Caution: Slippery When Wet

**Author's note: **_ The first chapter of this was first published as a one-shot. But because of the wonderful reviews and encouragement from friends, I decided to continue and expand it into a story. I've been meaning to post this a little later, after finishing some other stuff, but this chapter was begging to be written and posted ASAP. I simply couldn't resist._

**Author's note 2: **_I would personally like to thank bookworm123456 for being the first to post a review on my first fanfic :) and to MidnightWillowTree: yes, Cadan is one sexy beast. Please keep me posted about your story if you're going to make one! I'd love to read it. Gypsy1213: I agree 110% Will/Ellie/Cadan is delightfully intriguing. (I'm super excited so I decided to reply directly here and I should shut up right now)_

_Disclaimer: I own the Angelfire series only in my dreams. Unfortunately, in reality, I don't. So, enjoy!__  
_

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_**Caution: Slippery When Wet**  
_

When I open my eyes, the sky was only beginning to lighten. Normally, I wouldn't even dream of waking up this early; but because of the nightmares that engulfed my brain, sleep was not likely the best option. As I got up and automatically headed towards the bathroom, a small piece of folded paper perched on my nightstand put me to a halt. "A note?" I whispered, still doubtful my voice was functional at this time of the day.

I picked it up and scribbled on the top was my name. _Ellie. _Opening it, my first thought turned to Will. Maybe he wanted to cancel training or something. I set aside my meticulous thoughts and read:

_Hey beautiful,  
Couldn't stay away. I miss you already. Oh, and I forgot my jacket.  
_

Signed in elegant curves and strokes on the bottom of the paper was _C. _I nearly laughed. _Cadan? _Who knew he could be a romantic? Though hard to believe, I'd always imagined he had a soft side. Maybe not as dominant as his arrogant, playboy persona but enough of something good that keeps him apart from demonic reapers. _Different.__ Unique. And nearly human.  
_

And about his jacket, I left it at Nathaniel's. Will had been asking me where I got it and I told him that I found it somewhere in one of the closets. I didn't like lying to him but I didn't want him to get mad at Cadan. Or me.

I rub the sleep from my eyes and wonder how he had gotten that in my room, let alone my _house. _Will was usually on guard on my roof, looking out for any signs of trouble or danger. _Did he no sense Cadan? _Perhaps he took a break and left for a few minutes; long enough for Cadan to slip inside and infiltrate my home. It didn't seem right to tell Will. I didn't want to make him feel guilty for leaving. Assuming he want to Nathaniel's to rest, I couldn't bring myself to blame him for being tired. Again, a twinge of doubt pulls at the pit of my stomach and causes me to wonder where he'd really been.

I move quietly to the bathroom and tie my hair up. After washing my face, I decide to skip the show and just get dressed. An early morning jog sounds like a great choice right now, considering all the jumbled thoughts and emotions clouding my mind. I pace back, shoving the note in my jacket pocket and head downstairs, careful not to wake my mother.

Once outside I start moving quickly, eager to get a move on. The cold air signaled for me to start my jog, blowing in my face as I ran. After a few minutes, I realised I had no destination. Contemplating on where to go, I took a few turns here and there to end up at the park. The place was empty except for me and the birds that were happily trotting down the patch of grass and taking off into flight. I found a bench and made my way over to sit down. I can feel some of my anxiety lifting as my breathing slowed. Will was nowhere to be found. He was definitely somewhere else, off duty; taking a conceivable break from his roof time.

There was something about how he acted yesterday that kept me questioning his life as an immortal. There were some things that were meant to be kept unknown. Probably because it would hurt someone if they found out, or stir emotions inside of you that could lead to you hurting someone instead. _What has Will been keeping from me since the last time I died? _It wasn't a big deal. We all had secrets. But it was enough to leave my mind staggered and bemused.

My train of thought was disrupted by a mere presence of a squirrel staring at me like a dumbfounded rodent. I raised my eyebrows in amusement as it flickered its gaze to something behind me. _Something behind me. _I didn't have time to think as I hurled my fist at whatever was creeping up on me. My fist barely grazed my target and I saw Cadan's bewildered expression.

He raised his hands in defense and backed away. "Whoa there, hot stuff. Don't damage the goods!"

"Can't you at least _try _to be normal?" I demand, trying to keep myself from sending my fist flying towards his face to make up for the missed punch earlier.

My anger and surprise seemed to have fueled his cockiness as he ran a hand through his hair. "Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring, so I go back to being me."

I scoff. "Whatever. So, what are you doing here? Have you been following me?"

He quirks an eyebrow at me and walks over to the opposite side of the bench, now facing me. "More like _chasing._ Didn't you read my note?" He says coolly, "I missed you. It feels like I haven't seen you in forever." Smiling, I would've taken seriously if I didn't know better. His constant flirting was utterly normal for me to encounter on a daily basis.

"How did you get past Will anyway?" I sat back down, deciding it was better to settle into a calm state rather than badgering Cadan for his unexpected visit. For a while, I just sit there. Not really acknowledging anything else besides Cadan's warm and friendly presence.

He shrugged. "I kept my distance. But was close enough to see your guard dog hop off the roof and enter your room. Actually I thought he wanted to sleep with you or something." A slight pause followed, Cadan shaking his head in discomfort, "But a few seconds later, I saw him leave your house and headed off into the streets. So, yeah, I crept in like a ninja and left that note. The end."

_Will left? _I find myself wondering about his whereabouts. He never left me unguarded. Which brings me to the conclusion that is must have been an emergency. "Oh," was all I could say.

"What do you say? Wanna take off and get something to eat?" He stood and offered his hand. I ignored it and stood up as well.

"I'm all sweaty and gross." I laugh, wiping my forehead with my sleeve. As much as I want to get something to eat right now, nothing can compare with my need to shower.

Cadan looks at me for a second and smiles. "Okay. I'll walk you to your house." He winks and starts pacing ahead of me.

I had to half run to catch up to him. "It's fine, really. You don't have to."

"I want to," he says firmly, signalling me to quit convincing him to leave me alone. The walk to my house wasn't short, it took a few minutes to maneuver around the streets and finally locate the one my house was on.

We talked and cracked a few jokes, making it seem like we were old friends catching up. And it did feel that way. I was disappointed our walk would be over by the time we reached my house, but I figured all good things must come to an end.

When we reach the front door, I have the good sense to remember Will. _Was he here? Or still at Nathaniel's?_ I can't believe how easily I'd forgotten my worries from earlier. Another note was posted on the front of the door. It was from my mom. _Ellie Bean, left early to run a few errands. Hope you enjoyed your morning. Mom. _Typical. Me and Cadan all alone in my house. I fumbled with the door knob and after what seemed like a lifetime, I pushed it open all the way, letting the soft scent of home fill my lungs.

Cadan hesitates and just stays on my porch, probably waiting for my permission to enter. Not like it mattered. He'd entered my house last night. "So, are you going to let me in, _Ellie Bean_?" He asks, an innocent look on his face, clearly mirroring my thoughts about last night's break-in.

A grimace forms on my face as he calls me by my childhood nickname. The way he says it. He makes it sound ridiculous yet...amusing. "Do I have a choice?" I roll my eyes and make my way up the stairs.

"I guess not." I hear him close the door and sit down on the couch. "Well, I gotta say, your house looks a lot better in broad daylight." I grin widely, knowing he can't see my face, and laugh.

"That's good to know." And with that I reach my room and take a nice warm shower, forgetting all about the present. I guess you could say that the shower room is a place for all the decision makings in life, ironically, it's my place of mind-easing sanity and imagination.

I didn't take that long to shower because I was already hungry. It was around 7:30 so I had plenty of time. As soon as I slid my shower door open, I was horrified. _Where's my towel? _Crap. It could have happened any day but why now? Mentally cursing myself for probably throwing it in the hamper, I creep around towards the door with my water dripping down my body onto the tiled floor.

You know what sucks about tiled floor? It's slippery when wet. I feel my feet fly of into mid air as I scream my lungs out. A sickening crack follows not long after. A searing pain fills my head and I know I probably injured my neck and skull. It would only be a matter of time before my bones would start to heal. But that matter of time isn't fast enough before I hear Cadan pounding on my door yelling, "Ellie? Are you okay? What happened?"

"No! Don't come in! I'm fi-" A loud crash drowns out my protests and I hear glass breaking as a result of me trying to pull myself up. My perfume bottles plummeted to the ground and I guess Cadan couldn't help but force my bathroom door open, only to find me lying down on the floor with broken glass all over the place.

Eyes wide open and mouth gaping at me, I could see the evident shock on his face as he tried to take in what he's seeing. A play of emotions runs across his _neutral_facade and he quickly retreats into the room, his back facing the wall.

My face was boiling with anger and embarrassment. "I told you to not come in! WHY DID YOU?" I yelled, still lying on the floor while the rest of my broken bones weren't mended all the way just yet. For a second I think about what Cadan must be thinking now. _Oh, God. Why?_I rose from the floor, turning my head to test out my neck and it felt fine; fully healed. But that's not what I needed most right now.

Knowing it would feel ridiculous, I had no other option but to ask Cadan to hand me a towel. He was nothing but obliging; oddly silent but for good reason. If he made any retort about what just happened, I would have no choice but to beat him to a pulp. After handing me the towel, he left the room. Down to the living room, I suppose. Forgetting all about my thoughts on Will, I was still hungry and could feel my stomach growling in protest.

Getting dressed, the apprehension was slowly crawling on my skin. _He probably sees naked girls all the time. He won't make a big deal out of it and neither should you._ I thought. Then again, I remind myself that this is _Cadan _we're talking about.

"What do I do?" I say to myself, not expecting an answer but a solution. Not wanting to go downstairs and have to face Cadan, I found a few ways to stall, like combing my hair, not bothering to tie it because I would feel bare and exposed, brushing my teeth, twice, and clearing my head. I couldn't ignore my hunger anymore so I manned up and went descended down the stairs.

I tried to keep my face and voice as even as possible when I say Cadan standing near the door, looking at the pictures that were settled on top of the shelves. He looked up to acknowledge I was there, a soft smile forming on his lips. I smiled back but only just. It was awkward enough already.

"Are you hungry? We could grab a bite down town." I didn't want to look at him directly so I just focused on a spot near the top of his head.

"Sure. But I have to go find Will after." Cadan looked disappointed but I knew he understood the importance of me fulfilling the role of Gabriel in training. I was glad he didn't bring up the bathroom incident at all, but I swear, if he does, he may as well be dead.

We found a small cafe resto that wasn't too far away and decided we were too hungry to go any further. I ordered some eggs and a sausage, while Cadan just ordered a glass of water. We waited a few minutes before my order was served and I literally breathed in the food, not leaving a single crumb on the plate.

"Wow. You must be really hungry." He tilted his head and grinned, lightening the mood and lifting the tension.

I stuck my tongue out at him and he laughed. "Whatever. I didn't see you order anything. You're just like Will. He refuses to eat in front of me." I scoff. "Boys will be boys."

He chuckled. "_Men _will be _men_." He corrected wagging his finger at me like I'm a toddler in need of teaching.

"Right." I roll my eyes. "Well, I'm done. Shall we?"

"We shall."

* * *

After leaving a tip on the table, I told him that I needed to go and find Will. He nodded and exhaled.

"All good things must come to an end." _That's what I thought._ A day with Cadan isn't so bad after all. I might even want to do it again. Except the part which included me slipping and breaking my neck and Cadan seeing my naked body. I shook the thought off and focused on the things I needed to do. _Find Will. And Find out what he's not telling me._ That wasn't entirely fair, though. I have been hiding a lot from him these past two days. _You know what? I'll tell him._If I wanted to know the truth, I would have to tell Will everything to deserve finding out his secrets. I didn't like lying to him. For every good reason there is to lie, there is a better reason to tell the truth. And I know that now.

"Yeah." I sighed. He stood there in front of me, close enough for me to lay a hand on his chest, feel his heart beat, and wonder who it beats for. _Shut up. Why would you care? You have Will. _I mentally slapped myself and just stood there, staring at his amber eyes. I blink twice and look away.

"I'm guessing you have to go now. And I'll have to go too." He winked and said, "You still have my jacket."

I giggle in shame and realise I'll have to give it back to him soon. But I have a feeling there's something else I have of his, though I'm not quite sure what it is. "Right. I'll give it to you next time."

His grin grew wider and his eyes sparkled as the caught the gleam of the sun.

"What?" I asked nonchalantly.

He bit his lip and sighed. "It means that there'll be a next time." It was nice to think of seeing him again, even if it meant having to lie about it later on. I was determined to tell Will about Cadan, but I just couldn't find the right time to do so.

I didn't answer. I just looked up at the blue, cloudless sky, feeling the refreshing touch of the breeze lightly blow on my skin. Cadan took my hand and pressed his lips to my knuckle, which made me gasp in surprise.

"Until then," his gaze flickered to mine as he paused. "Ellie Bean." He laughed and disappeared into the Grim.

I didn't know if the other civilians noticed his sudden absence but I look around and see it they haven't, so I laugh by myself, looking like a complete retard and walk back home. After grabbing my car keys, I drive over to Nathaniel's and park my car right in front of the garage. I remembered Nathaniel was with Lauren for a few days, so I was glad to have Will all to myself. I had a _lot_ of explaining to do.

I open the front door, not bothering to knock and enter the house. Maybe knocking was a good idea after all.

My insides felt like lead as I saw Will and Ava standing beside the couch, engulfed in a deep conversation. Argument, perhaps? When Will saw me he took a quick step back from Ava and made his way over to me.

I attempted to keep my face free of any emotion and I guess it worked. Until the next few words came out of Will's mouth.

"We need to talk."

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_So, what did you guys think? Should I keep writing? Let me know what you think! I love hearing your opinions. They'll help me come up with even greater plots for this story._

_Love you all! xx Sandra._


	3. Come Away Now

**Author's note:** _I tried to update as soon as I could, as requested by my lovely friend, MidnightWillowTree. Unfortunately, I won't be able to update as much as I want because my parents are bitching about me sitting on the computer all day, when I obviously sit on the chair and not on the computer. I guess I'll just have to apologize for that, and my adolescent ranting as well._

**Author's note 2: **_It was tricky trying to capture the intense moments of this chapter so, forgive me if it's a bit vague and far flung. I got parts from the book itself and altered it a bit so, credits to Courtney Allison Mourton.__  
_

_Disclaimer: As much as I want to own the Angelfire series, it's not possible. So, enjoy!_

* * *

_**Come Away Now****  
**_

_And I can't cry hard enough, because I don't deserve to._

Four words that never fail to scare the shit out of me. _We need to talk._

It makes me think of all the things I've done wrong. Like not training properly, cancelling my sparring lessons with Will to go to the mall with Kate, seeing Cadan, laughing with Cadan...wanting Cadan to be with me right now and crack a smart-ass remark to lighten the mood. I shook the thought away like it was a bad omen. I couldn't afford to think about him right now. What I should focus on is the intensity of this situation. I didn't do anything _extremely _wrong. A day with Cadan wasn't a sin. And I would come clean with Will once I find out what he needed to talk to me about. I convince myself there's nothing to worry about. _Right?_

Whatever it was, it must have been urgent for Ava to feel the need to storm out. She gave him a hard look and Will returned the icy stare as she zoomed around us and slammed the door with so much force it made me jerk. It startled me to see Will so uneasy around me. So hesitant yet so eager to get it over with. I could try and guess what made Will so discomposed. Has he found out about my precious time with his least favourite reaper? Was he going to give me another sermon about how we 'couldn't be too close or romantically involved' because of my butt-head brother, Michael?

That couldn't be the case. It had to be something that involved Ava. _Ava. _I couldn't bring myself to conclude anything just yet. I had to hear it from Will. I _needed _to hear it from no one but him.

He was standing in front of me with his hands hanging loosely to his side. I watched him carefully, studying his gaze when he didn't say anything. I smiled when he finally raised his head to look at me and smiled back half-heartedly.

"What's up?" I ask, grabbing his hand and letting him rub my palm with his thumb. I knew he was nervous when he started sucking his upper lip and taking deep breaths to try and calm his nerves.

My smile faded as he began talking.

"I feel terrible keeping this from you, and I know it won't be pleasant to hear. But there's something you should know," he started.

I start to get tense as his grip on my hand is tighter with every word he says. _Keeping this from you._ So, it wasn't about me. It was about something Will had done. Maybe it would've been better if he scolded me about Cadan instead._  
_

I stayed quiet, not wanting to interrupt Will.

"Do you remember when we said no more secrets?" he asked as he shifted his gaze to the ground, his voice feeble and small. I swallowed hard and something tightened in my chest.

"Yeah," I reply with the faintest whisper, the word was almost nothing.

"It's been eating away at me," he said. "Devouring me from the inside out."

I shook my head, studying his dull green eyes in confusion. "I'm not quite sure I understand what you mean, Will."

"I thought everything was over." His voice was cracking, and he took a long, deep breath to steady it, but the effort was futile. "I believed that I'd failed for the last time, that you were gone forever, because of what I'd failed to do for you."

Fear tightened around my throat as I tried to figure out what he was trying to tell me.

"I loved you. I felt a part of me die along with you," he continued, looking up to meet my gaze at last. "And I was broken for so long. For forty years, I waited and waited and searched for you. I hadn't seen Nathaniel in over a decade, and I was so alone. Marcus and Ava came around a few times, and after being alone for so long, I stopped thinking or feeling. I hated myself for losing you."

I felt an urge to reach for him, but I was afraid to. Still, I stayed silent.

"Ava and I grew close," he said, looking away from me. "We …"

"So it's true, then. You slept with Ava?" I finally said.

"Yes." The word was barely audible, barely anything more than a small exhale of air through those lips I'd kissed and loved.

I was at loss of words. _It's probably a good time to shut up about Cadan. _I thought to myself. After all my plans to tell him at this moment, I couldn't bring myself to say anything.

I swallowed hard and took a step away from him. My fingers were numb. I tightened them into balls and stretched them back out to regain sensation, but as I did, the rest of my body began to lose feeling everywhere. I felt my knees buckle under me and clutched the edge of the counter for support.

He reached for my hand but I flinched it away before his skin could graze mine. I couldn't look at him. And I honestly didn't want to, mainly because I was afraid that the moment I made eye contact, tears would start streaming down my face and I know they would never come to a halt. I could tell I hurt his feelings by avoiding his touch but at this point, it didn't really matter to me as much as it should have.

Still, I tried to stay strong and keep my face void of any emotion; of any signs of the pain his words have inflicted. Will hadn't done anything peculiarly wrong by any standards. It's not like he cheated or anything. We weren't an item. I was practically dead when he had slept with Ava. But after his confession, it was hard to think of how it would affect our relationship. Well, what was left of it anyway.

I didn't have a claim to him, but I felt like I did, and knowing all that didn't make it hurt any less. I couldn't be mad at him or hate him, because I didn't have a right to.

"Ellie," he pleaded softly, his voice breaking, "please say something. Anything."

"I have to go," I finally whispered, managing to keep it soft but firm; and I was proud of that. Proud of how I could put up such a believable front; so believable that I could have fooled even myself if I didn't know any better. Constructing this wall of some sort and painting it with happiness, convincing people, and hopefully someday myself, that I may have been okay.

But in reality, I was the exact opposite of okay. I felt betrayed and alone. _And stupid._

"Ellie," he begged. "Please let me explain. She's only my friend. She is nothing compared to the way I feel about you." That sure did it. I could feel the sense of betrayal inside me be replaced with boiling rage.

"You don't have sex with people who are _only friends_!" I was sickened by myself. I didn't even know what I was saying anymore.

"It meant nothing. I was dead inside. I believed I'd lost you, the only thing that made my life worth something! You are all I knew, Ellie, and I'd died along with you. I never loved her, never loved anyone but you in all these centuries. You were gone and I gave up. When I found you again, barely a year afterward … I can't describe to you what it felt like to see you again after believing with every last thread of my soul that you were gone forever. Seeing your smile brought me back to life and killed me again at the same time. I felt like I had to tell you, after all these centuries, how much you meant to me, how much I have always loved you, in case I lost you again and you never came back. In case I never got to say it to you at all."

I shook my head and turned to leave. I didn't say anything to that. I couldn't and I wouldn't. Will didn't try to stop me, knowing I needed some time to process things. The image of Will and Ava would haunt me for the rest of my life. Even in my nightmares I'd see them. _Kissing. Touching._

I sigh as I reach for the door knob. My hand settles on the cold brass for a while before turning it and opening the door. A gush of icy wind greets me and I shiver, taking a few steps outside and onto the porch. I turned around to face Will and notice he hasn't moved an inch, with a look of concern and sadness.

My chest tightens at the sight of him. _So broken and miserable. _He didn't deserve that. "I'll see you later," I say. And with one final nod, I walk to Marshmallow and drive away, unsure of where to go. _Anywhere. Anywhere far away. Far away from all this misery. Far away from reality. Far away from Will._

I needed to talk to somebody. Anybody. Mom? No. Nathaniel? He was away with Lauren. Cadan? Possible but not likely. Kate? Definitely.

I give here a call and to ask if she was doing anything.

"I'm sorry, Ellie Bean," she said. "I'm a little caught up with something with my Mom and Dad. It's complicated, but I'll tell you everything as soon as we meet up. How about after school tomorrow?"

"Oh okay." I couldn't hide the disappointment that was evident in my voice but I knew she was trying her best not to make me feel neglected or anything.

"Love you. See you soon."

"Love you too, bye."

"Take care, Ellie."

I hung up and didn't know what to do. I didn't have Kate at the moment but I knew where I could go; _the library._ I figured no one I knew would bother me at the library and it sounded like the perfect escape. Unfortunately, the library is closed on Sundays, but I knew someone who could let me in either way.

I realize I've been driving around for hours before I even get to the library. I wasn't lost but I was trying to waste as much time as I could. It dawned on me that I wanted this day to be over.

Snow began to fall, lightly enough that it would be safe to drive in the dark if I went slowly, but tomorrow I'd have to shovel the driveway for sure. Three  
hours before 'closing' was the perfect amount of time for me to find a good book and curl up in one of the giant sofa chairs on the second floor.

"Ellie? What are you doing here? The library's closed you know." A plump woman emerged from the check-out desk and adjusted her glasses to get a better view of the newcomer.

"Hey Ms. Anderson. Can I hang here for a bit?" I ask. Ms. Anderson was a small, chubby woman who lived with three cats. She stayed at the library every evening, creeping around and reading every book about cats she could find. I wouldn't say she was the ordinary kind of person you'd find at these places. But with my life, nothing could and should be ordinary anymore.

She eased up and smiled. "I'd love to have some company at this hour."

* * *

After some searching through the stacks, I selected a book I'd first found on my mom's shelf when I was in middle school. I remembered being sucked in by the romance, so I grabbed it off the shelf and padded up the creaky stairs to the second-floor lounge, where it was quieter. I settled into a squishy chair next to an end table and lamp and lost myself in the novel. I didn't even notice the reaper in the room quietly suppressing his energy until he dipped his head over my shoulder and cast his shadow over the pages.

I jerked out of my seat to face him and dropped the book, startled by the sensation of the reaper's energy crawling on my skin like feather-light spider legs.

"Cadan!" I cried out in a hushed voice.

A gentle smile settled on his lips as he looked at me, clearly amused. "You must be really into that book. You didn't even noticed me until I was right next to you."

I blinked. "Yeah, it's a pretty good novel." I spoke quietly, not bothering to question how he'd gotten inside.

"Really? What's it about?"

"Stuff. The usual things you'd want to read about." I answer bluntly.

He stepped around my chair to sit in the one right next to me. "How was your day?" He asked, leaning back into the chair.

"Okay," I said, grabbing the book and closing it on my lap.

"Mine went great, by the way."

"Cool," I nod, not bothering to react to his matter-of-fact statement to make me feel guilty about my lack of concern.

"Oh. Why so..." He paused, trying to look for the right word. "Boring?"

I shrugged, not thinking about what he meant. I stared at the carpeted floor and allowed myself to just shut down, leaving my mind blank and empty. Just as a warm hand settles on my shoulder, I refocus everything in reality.

"Ellie," Cadan cooed. "Is something wrong?"

"No." But I answered all too quickly, remembering _him_ and my blood turned cold, running through my veins and making me shiver.

He took a deep breath and shifted his gaze to mine, his amber eyes reflecting the fluorescent lights of the room. "Tell me."

I was slightly appalled by how smooth his voice was. It was like velvet, coaxing. _Deep and sexy._

I shook my head. "We can't be too chatty here. Not in the library."

Rising from the chair, his hand offered his hand. "Then let's get out of here. Me and you. Being in libraries makes me feel...musty."

"Okay," I breathe, taking his hand and managing a half smile of appreciation.

After leaving the library, we settle onto a small patch of grass a few yards away. It was quiet and unnerving.

"So," he started,"what's up with you and your guard dog? Love quarrel or somethin'?" _I honestly don't know._

Silence.

"Did you two fight?" He asked; his voice filled with amid curiosity.

I opened my mouth to answer but nothing came out so I shut it again and sighed.

"Ellie. Talk to me. I might be able to help you. I'm a guy and I can do well as a shrink, too." He winks and I smile; genuinely.

I draw a sharp breath as I try to recall all exchanged interactions from me and Will. "Okay. Where do I begin?"


End file.
